Mes cheveux

Je ne sais pas quand mes cheveux sont devenus une affaire nationale !

Des peuples qui se sont mis d’accord pour ne jamais être d’accord, ils se disputent sur les points plus décisifs de leurs affaires … Ils se sont tous joints dans ce but sacré…

Nayala doit couper ses cheveux !

Je m’appelle Nayala … et l’histoire est que le jour de ma naissance, ma mère a décide de me nommer d’une manière folle et insensée … comme si elle prévoyait ce que son fils serait …

Ma mère a obtenu une carte géographique et elle a demandé à une petite fille “damnée” de passer son doigt sur la carte et … je porterai le nom du pays où elle s’arrêtera …

Je remercie Dieu que la fille ne s’est pas arrêtée en Afghanistan …. Mais elle a jugé que je resterai à jamais attaché à un nom que je déteste parfois, je ne le connais pas très bien peut-être, j’essaie de le fuir quelques fois … mais il restera mon nom pour toujours …

Elle a jugé que je serai “Nayala” …

Vraiment, je ne sais pas quand mes cheveux sont transformés d’une simple caprice à une affaire décisive.

Ce que je sais c’est que maintenant, je prends un grand plaisir en les provoquant. Je sens la joie de la victoire chaque fois que j’entends leurs opinions et leurs analyses éminentes.
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iEducate: Europe is Apple, America is Microsoft

Recently, I was looking for higher education opportunities around Europe when I was hit by this fact: If you’re not European, you have no chance.

Don’t get this wrong, I am not complaining about that. I wouldn’t expect a foreign country to give me what my own country didn’t. Like it or not, everything today is Money.

What hit me is that I always keep this thought at the back of my head, the thought that Europe is somehow different. I would expect to pay 20,000$ a year in the US but never in Europe. Why?

It’s about the  “Image” that Europe markets for itself. In computers’ terms, Europe is like Apple while USA is Microsoft.
Continue reading “iEducate: Europe is Apple, America is Microsoft”

Stop cheering for ICC …

STOP cheering for ICC because:

1. Because the whole issue shows how useless of a nation we are. ICC is not Al ta7aluf, ICC is not one of the “revolutionary” parties, ICC is not our dreams and hopes that we grew up with.

ICC is ICC, bad or good, we – Sudanese – have nothing to do with it.

2. This might be a day of glory for Ocampo, or for the victims “the REAL vicitms” .. They have every right to celebrate … But for the rest of us, this is the day that – officially – announced our FAILURE

3. Because we grew up with bullshit of a fucking revolution – for fucking 20 years – and now we look for our savior in a country as far as Argentina. It is fine to be weak (if we admit it) but let’s NOT be pathetic.

4. Because if anyone of you thinks that Europe, America or the West will shed a point of blood trying to save an African, then he’s an ignorant who should read some history (hint: google Rwanda)

5. Because all of us cheering, we ARE not the people in camps, we ARe not the darfurians who will be tortured by security forces, we barely had some relative who was killed or RAPED .. so, let’s start by admitting how weak we are – unable to say NO to our brothers being killed for years – and then let’s have the decency to shut up and let the REAL players decide

6. Because Albasheer never spent a day in a refugee camp, all these War lords never spent a day in a refugee camp, Ocampo merely knows what a Refugee camp is .. and you and me, we don’t have a clue .. so let’s NOT act as we KNOW,

We “might” care but we DON’T know.

Even this fucking post doesn’t know.


Today, looking from the window in my office, I felt faKe.

I’ve never felt “faKe” before. I felt like a liar, like a bastard, I felt weak, stupid, arrogant, I felt like nothing. But for the first time ever, I felt faKe.

I’ve been faKing it for so long, every day every hour. You can call it getting along, getting used, learning, experiencing, growing up .. whatever you wanna call it … But today, I found out it is simply being “faKe”.

I faKe watching the green light before crossing the street, I faKe being confident with the bar tender while ordering a “pint”, I faKe laughing at the stupid “Achmed” show, I fake not being astonished with the bus coming in the exact minute it’s supposed to come at, I fake being used to policemen that smile like human beings.

I fake being used to this clean street that I see from my fuckin window. God, how can they do it !!! … Whenever I look at it – Johan de Wittlaan (notice how faKe is the name!) – I expect a wave of dust that will turn this faKe beautiful scene into Khartoum or Cairo, you know, turn it into something I really know, something that I don’t need to “faKe” dealing with.

But … Will I – someday somehow – believe that it is “Normal” to look from the window and see a clean street and that there are policemen who actually smile, will I stop being astonished? … or will I stop faKing that I am not being astonished?

By the way, I just had lunch where we talked for an hour about Skiing resorts … looo0ool ..


Schiphol Apartheid

Have you ever passed through the non-Schengen gate in Schiphol airport?

Ok, let me re-phrase the question:

Have you ever passed the non-Schengen gate in Schiphol airport, holding in your hand, let’s say: a Sudanese, Kenyan, Indian or Cuban passport?

Schiphol airport – which is the main entry point for most people visiting the Netherlands – is imposing a policy, similar to third world dictatorships on its non-Schengen gate.

When you pass through the passport control, what is supposed to be a routine check becomes a nightmare if you don’t have the “right” nationality.
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veryone struggles to find a division for our world of today.. Of course, the division of a Capitalist vs. Communist world is no longer valid .. Some people divide us into a First world and a Third world .. Others talk about the clash of civilisations between East and West .. or the scenario of the axis of Evil vs. the axis of Good .. others talk about the holy fight between the faithful and the infidels .. But none of them managed to find the optimal division:

Our world is divided – my dear reader – into two camps:

The eBay world and The non-eBay world

eBay – on its homepage and on behalf of all the thinkers, the philosophers and theoritists –  managed to solve this dilemma,  according to the standards of the 21st century and without any compliments to any side. This world is divided into two opposing parts:

The eBay world: where your requests are granted with a mouse click, where the whole world lies on your screen, where your comfort – if you belong to this world – is the most important .. A world where the most complicated of things becomes very simple .. The eBay world where they would trust you, without knowing or meeting you, just because you “belong” to this beautiful world .. A world where the king is the Human Being

and the non-eBay world: where there is no such thing as a Human Being.


Ten years ago, I’ve started my journey into the eBay world. A journey that will – forever – take the label “Temporary”. I knew from the first day, that every day I spend in this world makes it harder to return to where I “belong”.

“Belong”, this is the dilemma I created for myself. Belong to where I don’t fit, or fit where I don’t belong. I spent the last ten years, immersing myself into this captivating eBay world, trying – meanwhile – to reach the middle ground between my two options. I did not reach it yet.

To be continued if it is to be continued.

What if Obama was Sudanese?

What if Obama was Sudanese?

Would he be able to marry my cousin, or will he be considered a descendant of an unreputable tribe.

What if he was an Arab, would he be able to get a national passport even if his family was there for three generations?

What if he was a European, would he ever escape the label of being a “foreigner” written in the color of his skin?

Some countries give you money, some give security, shelter, opportunity or a valuable peace of paper called a passport.

But only America offers everyone the true fulfilling proud feeling of “belonging” to it.

This is the greatness and simplicity of America and of being American: It is that anyone can “truly” be American.

Let’s all watch America with admiration .. and a little bit of shame.