I chose the stairs. In the heat of the moment, in the pressure of having to make a split-second decision without interrupting the perfect flow of London rush-hour commuters. I chose the stairs instead of the escalator.
Twenty seconds ago, it seemed like a perfect decision. There was the familiar bottleneck of Londoners trying to get on the escalator. I looked at the bottleneck, and I took an expert decisive left towards the stairs.
Twenty seconds after, my heart is racing, my knees are collapsing and I desperately just want to sit down on those same stairs. I look up and I can’t see the end, I look back and I am barely twenty steps away from where I started. I can turn back. But what about all those eyes that must be looking at me? What about my ex who dumped me for “lacking stamina”? This is more than just stairs.
And you know, every 10 steps on these stairs are a calorie lost of that delicious mocha I just had. Oh London! I move thousands of miles away to end up addicted to a coffee prepared by an East-London hipster who has my grandpa’s beard and sources his beans from my grandma’s homeland.
One more calorie. Two more calories. Three …. “Excuse me, sir”, a young man goes running by my side climbing the stairs two at a time. I tuck my belly in and instinctively touch my balding head.
Maybe if I think of a song, it goes faster. Something upbeat and suitable, “Hit the road, Jack and don’t you come back no more no more no more, hit the road…”, how come I have a perfect native accent when I speak in my head? When did I start talking to myself in English in the first place?
Ah an African dude is coming down the escalator. I have to give him the universal salute of Africans bumping into each other anywhere in the world, a.k.a the head nod with the half-wink and the implied “we’ve made it bro!”.
Maybe, it will be easier if I meditate. Breath in, Breath out, and count – one. Breath in, Breath out – two. Breath in. Wow, that girl coming down the escalator is so beautiful! Don’t stare. Look down and look up, so when she looks up, your eyes lock instinctively as if it was written in your destinies. Smoooth! Look down, look up. She’s still looking away. Down, up. She’s passing by – come on, look up, look up please, look UP! Oooh.. our kids would have been so beautiful.
You know what? I will just look at the posters on the side. Cat. Cat. Cat. Cat. What are all these cats? And why are all they staring at me with their creepy eyes? This is a nightmare. Am I standing still or are these posters repeating or did I get stuck in some kind of a black hole? Will I spend the rest of my life stuck in this tube station?
Oh maan. That cigarette I had with the mocha. That – definitely – wasn’t just tobacco!
Featured Photo From this blog post http://www.luxguestlist.com/en/blog/ten-facts-about-London